Thursday, June 23, 2005
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
"Want drive fast cars?" asks an advertisement, in broken English, atop the
Web site iaaca.com. "Want live in premium hotels? Want own beautiful girls? It's
possible with dumps from Zo0mer." A "dump," in the blunt vernacular of a
relentlessly flourishing online black market, is a credit card number. And what
Zo0mer is peddling is stolen account information - name, billing address, phone
- for Gold Visa cards and MasterCards at $100 apiece.
So let's get this one straight. You can get someone's stolen personal account information for only $100. You just go to the site, give the thief your personal account information, and get someone else's. Sounds foolproof to me!
Monday, June 20, 2005
I was attempting to avert my eyes from the guy in the billowing pants who was buying a package of Duane Reade hemmorhoid wipes ("compare with Preparation H wipes and save!") when I noticed a sign that was hanging above each register. "Vote here in the 1010 WINS Top 40 Newsmakers!" The sign helpfully gave a list of what can only be described as human trash. There was Jean Harris, Daniel Rackowicz, David Berkowitz, Sol Wachtler, Lemrick Nelson, Robert Chambers, Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuoco, and so on.
I went up to the 1010 WINS site just to find out what was going on, and it turns out that this was the week you could vote for the most "notorious" newsmakers. The winners were:
1 David Berkowitz 2 John Gotti, Sr. 3 Joel Steinberg 4 Amy Fisher and Joey Buttafuoco 5 Bernie Goetz 6. Robert Chambers 7 Tawana Brawley 8 Colin Ferguson 9 Leona Helmsley 10 Lyndon LaRouche.
My question is who would actually go online and cast a vote in favor of these people for ANYTHING? Someone actually decided that they should favor Joel Steinberg with a vote? Even for a contest like this, it just feels repellent.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
This is a new ad series on the NYC subway. It aims to remind kids of how awkward they look and feel by giving the official OK to wear glasses at school. This, of course, makes it instantly NOT OK.
The caption reads: See how cool things look. Don't miss out--wear your glasses to school each and every day. COOL HAS A NEW LOOK
This is reminiscent of the posters in my high school: Share a book / Share a ride / Share the feelings deep inside / But never share a hat or comb / Or lice could make your head their home. Just reading that made us all want to go out and get lice because, well, anti-authority.
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Monday, June 13, 2005
Guy: "Are you going to New York?"
Guy: (pause) "How do you get to New York?"
Me: "The train will be here in three minutes. You just get on it and it goes to Penn Station."
Guy: "I only have an off-peak ticket. Is there an ATM here?"
Me: "No, just a ticket machine."
Guy: "Well, I only have seven dollars."
His only saving grace was that he didn't have a crappy-yap dog as a seatmate. But then I got to work today, felt reaaaaally lousy, and went home early. I got to Babylon and changed over to the Speonk train. This guy was standing there looking lost. As soon as the train doors closed, he announced to no one in particular:
Guy 2: "This train goes to Amityville, right?"
Everyone: "No, this is the train out east. Amityville's the other direction."
Guy 2: "Shit I gotta get off this train!"