Friday, December 12, 2003

Holiday Haiku

Enemy of the day: The pudgy businessman in the next seat of the train. He took out a raggedy Kleenex, blew/picked his nose, then rolled it under the seat in front of him.

I’ve been working Rockefeller Center Holiday Tourist Haiku recently. Damn, these people are annoying. Here's a sampling:

Radio City?
You’re standing right under it.
You dumb-ass tourist.

"Please hold the subway!"
Yes it goes to Thirty-Fourth Street
Now get on or off.

Escalator’s dead
Four hundred ninety steps up
I hate Herald Square

I love a parade!
Millions of volunteers out
Your red jackets suck

Tall escalator
You just made it to the top!
Now just stand around

Counterfeit watches
Bought from a fake wheelchair guy
Worst Christmas EVER

Because of the storm
All PM trains are cancelled
Thanks for riding us!

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