Friday, October 21, 2005

Spooky

I got a Spooky Sounds machine at K-Mart today. It's remote controlled. You press a button and it makes one of several tinny, mechanical "spooky sounds." Why did I spend $9.99 on this piece of Chinese mastercraftsmanship? It was the testimonials on the back that really did it for me. A skull said "What was that noise??" The ghost replied "I don't know but it's scaring me!"

Think about it. The ghost was confiding in a GRINNING, TALKING SKULL about how scary the tinny, mechanical "spooky sounds" were. I figured that if it upset a spirit from the underworld, my neighborhood kids would be positively crapping themselves when they heard it. Further reports to come!

2 comments:

Jon said...

You've been forbidden from taunting opposing teams, so I fail to see how you're going to find use for this.

Peter Taylor said...

...I realized I was staring right into the groin of an old man who just pissed himself...

...my neighborhood kids would be positively crapping themselves when they heard it...

Start spreading the news
I'm leaving today
I want to be a part of it, New York, New York
These vagabond shoes
Are longing to stray
And make a brand new start of it
New York, New York
I want to wake up in the city that never sleeps
To find I'm king of the hill, top of the heap
These little town blues
Are melting away
I'll make a brand new start of it
In old New York
If I can make it there
I'll make it anywhere
It's up to you, New York, New York.

I want to wake up in the city that never sleeps
To find I'm king of the hill, top of the heap
These little town blues
Are melting away
I'll make a brand new start of it
In old New York
If I can make it there
I'll make it anywhere
It's up to you, New York, New York.