Friday, July 7, 2006

Winter/Summer Tragedies

Pictures like this really piss me off.

Sure, it looks cute enough. But WHY THE HELL WOULD THE SUN NEED TO WEAR SUNGLASSES? Is it going to get itself in its eyes? Is the Sun driving somewhere? No. It just sits there, rotating around the earth, burning itself out. There's no sunglasses, and there's no excuse for this shitty art.

That's the summer version. The winter version is this: a snowman throwing a snowball.

Oh, how precious. Well, no. See, this snowman is made out of snow. He's throwing a snowball made out of snow. This is the equivalent of a human throwing a big chunk of human flesh. It's ghastly and horrific. Why do we put coal smiles on snowmen? They are standing there with flakes of their own flesh falling out of the sky. They're generally standing on a lawn about 8" deep with snowman intestines and other internal organs, and they have these ineffectual twig arms. This is something out of nightmares. Unless, of course, they're smiling because they're borderline psychotic.


David said...

I love the snowmen from Calvin and Hobbes:
Calvin and Snowmen.

Jessica Trupin said...

Uh, rotating around the earth?

Joshua Trupin said...

Yes, around the earth. President Bush did say that we needed more science education. I don't believe that a heliocentric solar system has been proven any more than evolution has.

Peter Taylor said...

The sun needs sunglasses because of its own rays reflecting back off the Earth, DUMBASS.

Anonymous said...

Silly boy, its dangerous to look directly at the Sun even with