Sunday, April 19, 2009

The Escalade in its natural environment

Hulking, probably driven by some small-equipmented man-loaf, parked so that it perfectly straddles two spaces in a fairly busy parking lot with not-particularly-small spaces. You can almost hear him saying "I'm an Escalade, dammit. I need to be cutting you off without signaling--even when I'm not moving."


Seriously, I have never seen an Escalade being operated in a way that doesn't include tailgating, signal-free sudden lane changes, across-five-lane highway exits, and general swerviness. What is it about these lumbering boy-tanks that make their drivers so much worse than even the arrested development operators of an H2?

4 comments:

rkimedes said...

What is it about these lumbering boy-tanks that make their drivers so much worse than even the arrested development operators of an H2?H2's aren't Cadillacs. Cadillac drivers are jerks.

Joshua Trupin said...

And of course, driving back from NYC on the L.I.E. today, a black Escalade just decides it wants to be where I am. Just puts its front wheel in my lane and starts drifting over. I swerved around him and maintained position, and when I looked back, the Escalade's grille had a visible scowl on it.

Grace Nearing said...

Where I grew, taking up two parking spaces called for vigilante justice. If the justice was tempered with mercy, there'd be only two deflated tires: the front driver side and the rear passenger side. If there was no mercy, then all four tires would be deflated.

PeteR said...

This post is so 2005.